My heart is heavy tonight Jenna & Dominic LiBrandi my precious Grandchildren

Sept 9, 2014
My precious Grandchildren...my heart is heavy tonight.  Tonight; 2 years ago, is the last time I would see my son...your daddy.  My heart is breaking  for losing him.  I loved him so very much.  There are no words to discribe to you both the complete love I had and have for him.  You daddy had and has the same love for you...only now, it's from heaven.  When you have children you will understand that complete, utter, selfless love.
This is a love I have for you as well.  A love that I will ALWAYS have. A love I have always longed to share with you both.
I hope and pray that your mother will honor your father on his "angelversary" date every year that passes.  I pray that your mother will provide you with knowledge of your daddy and the love he had for you. I pray for YOU BOTH..I pray that one day we shall unit and I can put my arms around you again.....
I love you both so much...my heart aches...my mind and heart hurt...but my love remains.
ALL our loves remains for you both.  The "LiBrandi's" from Arizona to Ohio to Pennsylvania love you...they will always love you and will always want you both in their lives.
God bless you both....
Love you forever...
Your Grandma PJ

September 4, 2014 - Thinking about you so much

 

September 4, 2014

My precious ones

I write this to you because you are on my mind so strong.  I hope you are both doing ok.  I’m not doing so good right now.  I just can’t stop thinking of you both and how I so much wanted to spend time with you in your growing up years.  I feel so helpless and sometimes wonder if I should not fight for you, but then my mind and heart goes to thinking of what that would put you both through and I don’t want you to go through any more pain.  Losing your daddy was a big enough pain.  That I know.  It’s the worst pain I have ever felt in my life.  Losing you both was right there with it.

I so wish your mom and grandparents were different.  I wish they could begin to understand what they have done to us by keeping you away and I wish they knew what they have done to YOU BOTH as well, by keeping you from YOUR FAMILY.  You both have lost so much with us; your grandparents, your aunts and uncles and you cousins.  They love and wish so much you were in their lives.  There is so much joy to share….joy I so wish you were a part of.

This is not how I EVER wanted to communicate to either one of you but it is all I have.  I think, I write, I pray, I hope.  I have sent you cards, but I know that you have never received them….so I am doing this instead.  This so you know you have NEVER been forgotten.

The only thing that is keeping me sane is my faith….my faith in God…In Jesus.  I pray to him all the time.  I pray to him to keep you both safe, to learn the love of our Lord, to know the love of you precious Daddy, to know the love of this family that so longs to be with you.

My heart aches.  I don’t know at what age you will read this, but I hope it is sooner than later.  The love of a mother is huge and should not be selfish.  Moms for sure are not perfect; no one is on this earth.  That is why I choose to “forgive” the past.  Letters were not intended, but what was intended was total and complete love for you both in person.  I only so wish that had been.  Dear God how I miss you both with every being of my soul. 

Your Grandpa John is now 71 years old.  I hope and pray he sees the day when he can wrap his arms around you.  I worry so about this with his age.  He’s lost his son; your daddy; and he longs to see you both.  Time is a sometimes a friend but sometimes an enemy.  We can only pray that “time” can be a friend of ours to reunite with you both.

All for now.  I love you so very much,

Always & Forever

Your Grandma PJ

Thinking of you both Every Day

Saturday, August 30, 2014

I am sitting here at the computer working.  We have a large picture board that I can see from where I sit and your pictures are on there with your daddy.  I look at you both every day of my life. You both are so precious.  I just want to jump into the picture and hug you both.  Hug you like I used to do when I could see you. I so hope you can remember.  I miss you both so much.

I also have pictures of you both in our bedroom and around the house.  Everyone that comes over loves them and wishes they could know you as well.

I had so much fun being around you both for the short time that it was.  I was never allowed to bring you over to our house.  That also saddens me.  I always wished we could have you for a weekend, or even overnight or just for the day.  That would have been so much fun. 

I’m so hoping Jenna that you are still singing.  I think of your ever so sweet voice & wish I could hear it again.  You really could sing so well.  YOU TOO Dominic….You sang a little for me.  I hope you kept it up too. You both got your Daddy’s voice.  He loved to sing too.  I don’t think you know this, but your Daddy tried out for American Idol!  He didn’t make the cut, but he had fun auditioning for the show.

Your cousins Isabella, Sara & Sophie have great singing voices too.  I told them how good you are too.  Your cousins Dante & Gabe are both the sport young men.  Both are into baseball & football.  Someday they hope to see you both.  They would love it so much.

I’m hoping you have a fun Labor Day weekend.  Although I know you will not read this till much, much later.  When, I don’t know, but someday.

I keep praying your Mom & grandparents will somehow see how wrong they are in keeping you from us.  I keep praying that they will know the sadness and hurt they have put upon us all & will realize that what they have done and are doing is one of the utmost hurtful inhumane things one can do to your Daddy’s side of the family and what an injustice it is to you both as well. 

Always know you are in my heart, and in the hearts of every member of your Daddy’s side of the family.  We all miss you tremendously and pray for you every day.

Love you forever,

Your Grandma PJ

PJ LiBrandi

Paula Jo LiBrandi

Some Pictures for you to see Jenna Rayne LiBrandi & Dominic Dubs LiBrandi taken in 2014

This is your Grandpa John (Your Daddy's Daddy) & your Uncle Joe

This was taken on your Grandpa's "71st" Birthday.  How I wish you were here to celebrate it with us.
His birthday is August 2nd.

This is a picture of your Cousins.  Sophia LiBrandi, Sara LiBrandi & Gabe LiBrandi.  This was Gabes 8th Birthday.  Taken August 24th.

This is a picture of Me, Grandma PJ, your Aunt Dana LiBrandi Lomma, Aunt Michelle, your cousins Dante & Isabella Lomma.  We were in San Diego with them for vacation.

These are just a few of many I will post in the days, months & years ahead for you both.  I love you.
Grandma PJ...XOXOXOXOX

August 27, 2014 To my precious Grandchildren Jenna Rayne LiBrandi & Dominic Dubs Librandi

August 27, 2014
Dearest Jenna & Dominic....
I know both of your birthdays have passed.  Jenna, you are now 9 & Dominic you are now 7.  It breaks my heart that me & the rest of this family are not allowed to celebrate with you.  I can only tell you that I love you so very much, as does your Grandpa John, Aunt Michelle & Uncle Joe as well as all your Aunts, Uncles and Cousins.
I used to be able to go on Facebook & every so often would be able to see a picture of you both, but that too was taken away from me just a couple of weeks ago.  I just cried & cried. It was all I had left. Your mom shut down her FB page.  I know neither your Mom or grandparents want us to have any communication with you.  I so PRAY to God above that that will change once you are grown up to find us.  I PRAY that you both will be open to hear our side of the story.  Your daddy's family are all good loving people.
Your Daddy's second angelversary in heaven is nearing. It will be Sept. 10th we are all 2 years without him.  My heart is so very heavy.  We all miss him so much.  I look so forward to the day we can all sit with you & talk to you both about your wonderful daddy who loved you so very much.  You both were the apple of his eye..
I know you probably always wonder why?  Just know that we would do NOTHING to hurt either one of you, therefore, we choose now to let things be until you are older.  Old enough to understand & old enough to make decisions for yourselves.  ALWAYS know that there is not a day that goes by that I don't think of you both, pray for you both & wish you were in our lives.
My heart breaks knowing you are out there, so very close & we cannot be with you.  May GOD protect & keep you both....You are eternally in my heart & in the hearts of every member of the LiBrandi family....
Love you eternally....Your Grandma PJ  XOXOXOXOXOXOX
When it is time for you to find these blogs, the pictures & letters on Pinterest and if you want to call us our phone number is 623-572-9516.  My cell number is 602-625-4684.  I pray for that call one day...

To my Precious Grandchildren Jenna Rayne LiBrandi & Dominic Dub LiBrandi

March 8, 2014

My Darling Grandchildren,

Jenna Rayne LiBrandi

Dominic Dub LiBrandi

Letters will be posted to you Jenna & Dominic…

I will write bit by bit….little by little...in the “knowing” that someday thanks to the internet,  you will, in hope & faith, be able to see this page and learn about your Daddy’s side of the family.  I have created not only a pinterest page for you to hopefully find, but also this blog.   

 Our family has ALWAYS loved you oh so very, very much, but has not been able to be a part of your lives for reasons that we have never understood because of your mom, your grandpa Wrenn and your grandma Wrenn.  For some reason they made the choice to not share you with us and so many times would not even share you with your daddy.  They do love you, this I know, but they have done you an injustice in your lives by not letting you know and love us too.  These letters and words I KNOW will be hard to read and to understand but they are words of truth contrary to what you might have been told in the past.  We ALWAYS wanted you in our lives and we have ALWAYS loved you.  You are one-half LiBrandi and that you should be very proud of.  We are a loving and giving family and your Daddy was one wonderful LOVING daddy.  We miss him so much and I know you do to.  I wish you had had more time with him.  That’s really all he ever wanted was BOTH of you.  You both were his world and his heart. 

There will be more notes to come on this page. 

This is very hard for me to write and to have public, but I know in my heart that someday you will find this. 

I love you,

Grandma PJ

This picture is the last time I was allowed to see you.  September 27, 2012.  It's your Grandpa John, your daddy's daddy and me, Grandma PJ with you both.